EXPLAINING YOURSELF

Every Tuesday Two Writing Teachers provide an opportunity to share your writing.
Every Tuesday Two Writing Teachers provide an opportunity to share your writing.

I have been struggling with an interpersonal relationship problem since July of this year.  With regularity two friends who are also relatives stop speaking to me.  Each time they stop speaking to me, it has caused me to search my conscious to find out what I have done to offend them so much as to cause this reaction.

The other night when I arrived at our country club for dinner, this couple were apparently so upset by my presence that they wouldn’t even sit in the same dining room.

I went home and reviewed my recent history with them and thought and thought about what I possibly could have done to cause such a dramatic reaction.  I prayed for some insight into what was the cause of this problem.  Of course, after I went to sleep, I woke up with the AH moment sent to me from God.  Now I don’t know if this AH moment is truly the reason but it is as close as I have gotten for an explanation.

But the kicker with the AH moment is their reaction to what they perceive as probably what I have done to another family member is none of their business.

And then Monday morning I opened my Email and received from simplyettad.wordppress.com this post –

sue fitzmaurice

Do you ever feel as though God is talking directly to you?  I feel that way today.

Wishing you moments of insight,

Bernadette

About Bernadette

I live in the small town of Haddonfield, NJ. I am at an age in my life when I seem to spend time thinking and musing about life. These musings are usually stimulated by my walks through Haddonfield, my reading of books and fellow bloggers, and my interaction with my group of fabulous family and friends.

16 Responses

  1. I love this quote! I have had that happen so much where I have done some invisible thing, I go over and over it, then the person moves on and I have wasted my time anyway! Hope all is well Bernadette and you feel good! Huge hug to you!

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  2. I’m scratching my head a little here as I have several reactions to the meme and your dilemma. First, I tend to confront people face-to-face if I’m getting the cold shoulder. Rather than mull over a situation, I ask directly what the problem is. Sometimes I avoid the person, but this is impossible when dealing w/ family who live nearby, which may explain why I prefer living far away from familial drama. As I’ve aged, I tend to realize more and more that I don’t have time for petty games. There are, at times, moments of discomfort w/ friends, but I’ve learned these will pass if we give one another some space and have time to “let it go,” whatever “it” is.

    Regarding the meme, maybe it’s the way we’re explaining something that’s the problem. I can’t use the same methods to explain a concept to students who don’t understand it in the first place. I have to find a different approach. And how do I know the person doesn’t want to hear the explanation? I find the meme reductive.

    Anyway, I hope things get better.

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  3. You can only live your life to the best of your abilities. Others are important in our lives, but sometimes we have to move on when you can’t budge the wall that was built. Life is too short.

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  4. Bernadette, I am having this same exact problem, but with someone I love very, very much. We are temporarily on a hiatus from speaking I guess. This advice really resonates with me today, and I’m glad you shared it here. Gives me a lot of food for thought.

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  5. It is impossible to figure out what has upset someone when they won’t say. You could drive yourself insane trying to figure it out and it just isn’t worth it. Those Ah-Ha moments definitely sent from up above.

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  6. It’s a mystery why some are “in a pickle” & won’t act like grown-ups & actually sit down & talk. Life is indeed too short to waste your thoughts, better to love life and enjoy the ‘gifts’ of ah-ha moments.

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  7. Yes, I have had those moments. Just recently in fact, I was questioning about a hard decision we made and was getting one of those thoughts like ‘I sure hope we’re doing what we believe is the right thing to do” and then I read something ‘like you’ a scripture in this case which to me was an answer that confirmed our action as being right. … Diane

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